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View Full Version : So I don't love EVERYTHING about Chicago...


SoxFan76
03-14-2007, 04:34 PM
Rant time.

Sunday I'm at the parade. Me and my buddy lose our group, we're wandering around on Artesian. I had to go. Drinking all day, I had to effing piss. For those that have been to the parade, those lines are 45 minutes long. But I had to GO! So I stopped in a little corner, but not in an alley, and pissed. I got caught, that's not why I'm mad. I deserved that for being fucking stupid.

The cops get out of the car, yelling at us calling me an animal because animals piss outside. Fuck this, fuck that, fuckin stay there. Hands on the wall. He pats me down.

In case you missed it, I was peeing outside. They should of seen me earlier when I was raping this chick. :jagoff:

So anyway, he writes me up a ticket. I'm freaking out because I plan on becoming a teacher. I ask if this is on my record, he says no. I said I want to be a teacher, will this affect that. He says no. I ask how much is the ticket. He goes anywhere from 50-75 bucks. I was drunk, so I never asked how much. I ask if I can mail it in. He says yes, it's a mail-in ticket. I ask if we can keep our backpack of beer because we're of-age. He says no, takes it.

This backpack, mind you, is my buddy's backpack. The one that wasn't there for this fiasco. I find my buddy, he has 50 bucks in there. I find a sargeant and ask for the bag back, minus the beer. He calls some people, we get the 2 cops that busted me and another guy who looked high up there. Cigar in his mouth and everything. He starts DRILLING us. He pulls out a pill and asks if we're doing pills. My buddy informs him that it is an advil. He then accuses us of smoking dope.

"You guys smokin dope? Smokin weed? You guys are in BIG trouble now!"

We don't smoke.

We tell him to rip up the bag and look for it. "No, that's alright."

We get the bag back.

Let's move forward to 10 minutes ago now. I'm looking at this ticket trying to figure out how much it is, but it doesn't say. I'm calling all these numbers posted on the ticket, none of them exist. I finally go online and find numbers, and I had the great pleasure of talking to those wonderful and polite city workers.

They treat me like I'm stupid, but I get some info. Re-read the paragraph about me asking the original cops all those questions about the ticket if you forgot, because it's crucial to this next part.

This city worker tells me that you have to appear in court, it is not a mail in ticket, the fine ranges between 100 and 500 bucks, not 50 to 75. This actually MIGHT be on my record, and I COULD go to jail. I won't, but the possibility is there. The guy on the phone degrades me a little more, and I hang up.

Now I have to drive to Chicago on April 18th and appear in court. Fuckers.

Lucifer
03-14-2007, 04:46 PM
Seams like an awful amount of shit just for taling a piss outside. Who the doesnt piss outside at events like that? Where was this at?

JohnBasedowYoda
03-14-2007, 04:50 PM
Ugh... I'm sorry friend.

And to think I was passed up twice by the CPD:mad: apparently because of failing a psych test. Here I am really a nice guy (in the real world, not the message boards) who's never done shit wrong really.

I like to tell people that aske me about it that I'm not crazy enough to put 100 rounds into an unarmed civilian.

CaptainBallz
03-14-2007, 04:59 PM
I got the wizz-ticket about a year or so ago near Milwaukee and Damen. Had to go to court. It was gay.

I was redeemed when I asked the cop who he ticked off to have to go looking for guys with their dicks out all night. He said, "fuck you" and I was the victor for a mere moment.

JohnBasedowYoda
03-14-2007, 05:12 PM
This remminded me of a Kings of Leon concert I was at. ..

It was the Congress theater and The Secret Machines were opening (meh) and the crowd was pretty open and tame during their set. When they're done my buddy moves up front and I decide to go hit the can real quick. Well I make my way back to the front of the crowd and people are cool about it and there's this short Irish (if he was taller than 5' I'd be suprised) prick in my path. I say excuse me and he turns around (at this point my friend is like 3-4 rows of people ahead of me) and gets in my face. "you're not getting past me. I didn't pay to have some asshole stand in front of me" "hey look pal i'm just trying to join my buddies, what's your problem?" He then pulls out a CPD badge and says, "ashhole you want to start something?" I couldn't believe he did that and said "are you serious? this is a concert and I'm just trying to have a ..." and then he shoves me and tells me to fuck off. Well at that point I just joined some other people that were chillin near the back.


Point is: most cops are dicks

LuvSox
03-14-2007, 05:19 PM
Point is: most cops are dicks


:bluesbrothers:

JohnBasedowYoda
03-14-2007, 05:22 PM
Wow you have to go to court for that? My and my two buddies all pissed behind the dumpster next to the burrito joint and liquor store--plus two utterly foul mouthed girls also squatted. The hilarious thing was this senile old man, not unlike Blue from Old School, was leaning against the dumpster drinking a beer and laughing to himself, minding his business the entire time.

This was in the wake of the parade when most everyone was still there. Shit, I was taking a risk there.

The cops were dicks though. We were hanging around talking to people waiting for things to cool down and clear out so we could maybe get into one of the packed bars...this was in front of Mr. Submarine....and these cops were all rude and yelling at us to leave and shit. I was polite, like well can I signal to my friend inside that we're leaving? They gave me a bunch of shit. Brokebacks. But I guess they were running low on patience after working that day.


I'm with you, it takes a fould breed of woman to go in public. When I worked at Jewel this cashier chick did it after we left a party. It sickened me so much I just dropped her off and went my way

Palehose13
03-14-2007, 05:31 PM
If people dealt with what they deal with the majority of the time, I would imagine that almost everyone would be a dick too. :shrug:

1951Campbell
03-14-2007, 05:37 PM
So anyway, he writes me up a ticket. I'm freaking out because I plan on becoming a teacher.

So, was this a ticket for public urination or indecent exposure?

Incedent exposure will be much more of a problem than public urination for a teacher-to-be.

Also, get a lawyer, immediately.

JohnBasedowYoda
03-14-2007, 05:43 PM
If people dealt with what they deal with the majority of the time, I would imagine that almost everyone would be a dick too. :shrug:

Perhaps, but they knew what they're getting into.


Cops should not have these bursting egos and superiority complexes.

1951Campbell
03-14-2007, 05:43 PM
Point is: most cops are dicks

I'd put it at 60-65%.

And in my limited experience, if they tell you that they know the law...well, they don't. Just yesterday I had a cop tell me he coached a witness to lie (:omg:) like it was no thang.

JohnBasedowYoda
03-14-2007, 05:46 PM
I'd put it at 60-65%.

And in my limited experience, if they tell you that they know the law...well, they don't. Just yesterday I had a cop tell me he coached a witness to lie (:omg:) like it was no thang.

On Christmas day I had a FOREST PRESERVE patrol officer pull me over and told me my license plate registration sticker was in the wrong place. I told him if you can SEE it (it was in the middle of the damn plate) then what's the deal?

LuvSox
03-14-2007, 05:47 PM
It's the cop on the street that gives you attitude for no reason that gives them a bad name. The cop that is a dick while writing a ticket for a traffic violation, so on.

SoxFan76
03-15-2007, 02:30 AM
Just to let you all know, I'm here. I'll reply tomorrow when I'm sober. I need to pass out. Campbell and Val, I have replies for you specifically.

StockdaleforVeep
03-15-2007, 02:41 AM
Sucks but you should learn, always piss somewhere you cant be seen

I wonder if you can argue against the cop saying what the ticket was and if itd be on yer record or not, also, for the harassment,accusing you guys of drug using

cbotnyse
03-15-2007, 06:29 AM
Just be glad you are in Chicago and not Michigan. I've heard that if you get caught peeing in public there you could be put on the sex offender list.

Efilnikufesin
03-15-2007, 08:15 AM
If a chick has to go she has to go, but also the parade was over and the lines really weren't bad--they were worse for the guys.

My friend was hitting on them before hand just being drunk and stupid. He said something like "do I know you? I know you from somewhere bla bla bla" and the one was like "oh yeah I know you you fucked my grandma like 15 years ago." Just being really combative and horrible. :omg:

So he was like "yeah I fucked your mother too." Fight fire with fire I guess.

They said a lot of other shit I can't possibly remember. But I've never heard a mouth like that on a chick. We ended up talking friendly and she cooled down once she realized we weren't like trying to rape them apparently. And we went our separate ways. They were just shitface drunk...

Those seem like the type you want to bring home and introduce to mom! :D

Unregistered
03-15-2007, 08:34 AM
And to think I was passed up twice by the CPD:mad: apparently because of failing a psych test. Here I am really a nice guy (in the real world, not the message boards) who's never done shit wrong really.


That's probably why you got passed up. You're a babe in the woods, Yoda. :shrug: